Guardian Ad Litem, Custody, Custody Battle, Family Law, Visitation, Child Custody.
What To Do When… You Don’t Like Your Guardian Ad Litem.
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The objective of the What To Do When… podcast is to discuss common legal scenarios faced by everyday citizens in Virginia. Critzer and Cardani practice law throughout Virginia and focus their practice around the state’s capital of Richmond, in the Piedmont region. Tune in and subscribe to learn about legal topics such as reckless driving by speeding, bad lawyers, Will Knows Weed, juvenile defense, juvenile sex crimes, reckless driving, the legalization of marijuana in Virginia, divorce 101, Child Support, There is Still Hope, and others.
What To Do When… You Don’t Like Your Guardian Ad Litem.
On this legal video podcast chat in Critzer Cardani’s What To Do When… legal chat video podcast series, join our hosts Jackie Critzer and Scott Cardani as they chat about What To Do When… You Don’t Like Your Guardian Ad Litem. This video and audio podcast episode focuses on how to navigate being assigned a Guardian Ad litem in a child custody case here in Virginia.
Tune in today for not only our top 3 take-aways, but also some chat about the following subject matters and other helpful action items from a ‘legal chat slant’ from Critzer Cardani’s legal partners.
* Jackie Critzer explains that a Guardian Ad Litem is a court-appointed attorney who investigates and makes recommendations in the best interest of the child.
* Scott Cardani clarifies that the Guardian Ad Litem is not an attorney for the child but represents the child’s best interests.
* Jackie and Scott discuss the common misconception that Guardians Ad Litem are similar to social workers.
* Jackie emphasizes that being honest and not exaggerating is crucial, as any dishonesty can negatively impact the parent’s credibility and custody case.
* Jackie Critzer advises against being possessive of the children and emphasizes the importance of using inclusive language when communicating with the Guardian Ad Litem.
* Scott Cardani reiterates that being honest and succinct in responses to the Guardian Ad Litem’s questions is key.
* Jackie explains that while it’s difficult to remove a Guardian Ad Litem, parents should focus on following the advice given by their attorney.
* Scott concludes by reminding parents that they will have their day in court to present their evidence and that cooperation with the Guardian Ad Litem is crucial.
The objective of the What To Do When… podcast is to discuss common legal scenarios faced by everyday citizens in Virginia. Critzer and Cardani practice law throughout Virginia and focus their practice around the state’s capital of Richmond, in the Piedmont region. Tune in and subscribe to learn about legal topics such as reckless driving by speeding, bad lawyers, Will Knows Weed, juvenile defense, juvenile sex crimes, reckless driving, the legalization of marijuana in Virginia, divorce 101, Child Support, There is Still Hope and others.
Thank you for sending us your feedback, questions, or topic suggestions for future #WTDW | What To Do When… episodes by emailing [email protected].
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Transcript:
What To Do When… Intro 00:01
Welcome to What To Do When… A podcast from real lawyers with real perspective, where we explore a variety of legal issues and scenarios. Each week we focus on a new topic and discuss what to do when and if any of these legal scenarios ever happened to you or a loved one. With over 40 years of combined legal experience, our hosts offer their unique perspectives and insights on a range of real life legal situations.
Jackie Critzer 0:28
Hi. Welcome back to another episode of What To Do When… here at Critzer Cardani in Richmond, Virginia, I’m Jackie.
Scott Cardani 0:34
I’m Scott. Jackie. What’s on the docket for today?
Speaker 1 0:38
What To Do When… You Don’t Like Your Guardian Ad Litem.
Scott Cardani 0:43
What is a Guardian Ad Litem? I know we covered this before, but we probably should cover it again.
Jackie Critzer 0:46
So, it’s a court appointed attorney. Not an attorney for your child, but it is a court appointed attorney in a custody case that is appointed to investigate and to make recommendations that are in the best interest of the child or children. Is that right?
Scott Cardani 1:04
Exactly. And you know, a lot of people confuse this, like it’s almost like a social worker, like you said, somebody who’s representing the child.
Jackie Critzer 1:10
Yeah.
Scott Cardani 1:11
Technically, your job is to do what’s in the best interest of the child, which sometimes goes against that child’s wishes.
Jackie Critzer 1:18
Right.
Scott Cardani 1:18
And there’s a bunch of factors that can be followed. And they have a …. All Guardian items, which I still am, one I don’t do much anymore. But, you know, have rules and things they have to follow in meeting the child, and, you know, meeting them a couple days before trial at least, and all those kind of things that they have to do. So what we’re talking about is what to do when you are not happy with that person. Say, I am. Again, we always use each other. But there’s this crazy guy named Scott Bowen. We’ll just use him today, and he’s in a custody battle with his baby mama. Baby Mama. Maurice, yeah, I don’t know. And there it is. So we get, I get appointed as guardian litem, okay, I go interview Scott, and I go interview his baby mama, and we’re talking, and everything’s going good. And, you know, from my perspective, I’ve talked to both people. I go to school, may the kids their school age, may they’re gone, usually, if their school age, I’d like to go. I always try to talk to a kid in more of a neutral environment. If you’re in a parent’s home, normally, the kid will bend to that parent’s wishes – it’s very normal.
Speaker 1 2:25
That’s anything to do with the parent necessarily. It’s just the child’s perception of what’s happening exactly.
Scott Cardani 2:32
And a lot of kids try to please both parents. So in one house, I’ll say one thing one house. So if you get them a neutral environment there, tend to have that pressure removed from them, and they’re a little more honest and straightforward. So that’s what I’ve always tried to do. But so, you know, just say that process going on today’s Guardian items mostly send out this 20 page form that you have to fill out as a parent. And so we’re talking about What To Do When… you’re not happy with them.
Jackie Critzer 2:59
Well, when or when or when you just don’t like the position they’re taking, right? Maybe they’ve let their opinion be known early in the case, assuming they’ve been doing the work. Right? We’ve talked about Guardians who sometimes just don’t get involved and really don’t do their job, not talking about that. This is a guardian who’s been involved, at least on, you know, hit the high notes and and you as the parent are just not digging in what they’re putting out. You just don’t like what it is they’re saying or what their opinion is. So we, I get this a lot. I’m sure, Scott, you do too, where, you know, the Guardians aren’t always completely neutral. Sometimes they do draw an opinion early on in the case, they’ve gone through the questionnaire, they’ve met with the children, they’ve met with each parent. Maybe one parent is particularly combative all the time, which we get sometimes we’re the ones representing the combative person. Sometimes we’re representing the person on the other side of that who is trying to limit contact, to limit conflict, and they can be seen in a different light. So what do you do when you’ve got an attorney and or don’t, but you don’t like the guardian ad litem. Let me tell you what not to do. First, do not become embroiled in a battle with the guardian ad litem. It will not serve you.
Scott Cardani 3:20
Not at all.
Jackie Critzer 4:01
It won’t serve you. They’re not there to do what you want them to do or to do what the other side wants them to do. They’re there to represent what your what’s, what’s in the best interest of your child or children. So you should answer their questions, answer their emails if they need to come to your house. Give them an appropriate time frame that they can come to your house. You know, if they if they need most of the time and they’re going to a house, they’re looking in the fridge to make sure there’s food. They’re walking around very briefly to make sure that it’s appropriately appointed. The kids have a room or a bed, something like that. If they’ve come to your house, it’s because they just need to take a look around. It’s not to say that you have dirty dishes in your sink or that you have, you know, a spill. On the floor from the toddler from five minutes ago, just before they walked in the door. Like that’s not a big deal. It’s making sure that that everything’s appropriate.
Scott Cardani 5:08
And just remember, the Guardian item has an order where he has access, or she has access to whatever she wants to. Basically, your kids records, the school, the kids your house. So when I was a guardian item, I used to was called, I used to show up in surprise visits. And the reason I did that was I wanted to get a feel for what was really going on in the home, not the whitewashed version that, you know, you know, I’m coming at seven o’clock. You swept and vacuumed all the house I don’t care about, I never cared about, you know, conditioning the house. Understood that parents, unless it was a danger or some kind of trap, you know, that way. But you know, if parents were generally decent with that kind of stuff, I was more looking for the interaction with the kids in that moment, how they were, how they were dealing, and I tried to get a very honest perspective of that so, but Jackie’s right, you know, if somebody knocks on your door and says, hey – I’m the Guardian Ad Litem shows the paperwork, you don’t go You can’t come my house if you don’t make an appointment, or you’re not going to see my kid at school, or all these kind of things because you’re mad at them. That’s just going to dig your hole deeper.
Jackie Critzer 6:06
Right, now there’s reason to suspect that something’s not quite right. Why aren’t you letting the Guardian come in? And that will be reported back to the judge. The judge will hear that they showed up. You wouldn’t let them in. It’s just not going to serve your case. It’s not going to serve your custody case. And then you’re going to want to listen to another podcast. We’re going to do that says – What To Do When… You Lose Custody. Okay, you need to be, first of all, non combative. So in other words, what to do, keep the peace. Secondly, be honest. Do not lie. Be on because let me tell you something if, if a guardian sniffs a lie, they’re gonna find out what’s going on. They’re gonna find out the truth. And then if they find you to have been dishonest about something, they’re gonna wonder if you’ve been dishonest about everything, and that’s gonna put your entire character into question and whether you can appropriately make decisions for your child, child or children, and that will ultimately put your custody at risk. So be honest.
Scott Cardani 7:02
Yeah – let me say, let me take that one step further. Refrain from extra exaggeration.
Jackie Critzer 7:08
Oh, I like that. That’s good.
Scott Cardani 7:09
Because, um, you know, that kind of comes out as a lie too. For instance, what happens in a lot of these cases is a parent, you get so frustrated that nobody’s seeing your perspective, that you tend to embellish it a little bit, trying to get somebody to see it, you know, and that turns into somebody perceiving you as lying. And then your embellishment kind of wipes out your whole argument. And then again, you’re even more mad because nobody’s listening to you. So Jackie’s absolutely right. Be honest. Don’t exaggerate. Do These Things that and communicate. Well, if you have an attorney, make sure you talk to them that you don’t like the Guardian Ad Litem and why, and explain to them. And let me say this too, because I think it’s an important part of this. The Guardian item may be against you or may not like you, but that doesn’t necessarily end the case, and it’s not. Most judges I know don’t follow carte blanche what a guardian ad litem says. Their job is to take a recommendation from The Guardian ad litem, in the light of all the other evidence, and then put that into his processing. And I find most judges to do that. I’ve had judges as a guardian for me not take my perspective at all.
Speaker 1 8:16
In representing a party in the custody case. I’ve had judges say, Madam guardian or Mr. Gardian I appreciate your opinion. I appreciate your thoughts on this case, but I don’t agree with you. So it’s possible it’s not going to be the you know, they’re not the end all be all in your custody case, but it is important to make sure that you are communicating well with the Guardian, and that includes home visits. You keep the peace.
Scott Cardani 8:42
Filling out their 30 page form or 20 page form, and doing a good job. Don’t get frustrated with it and start putting snarky answers because on answer 25 you’re sick and tired of answering the questions. Take your time. Be can be honest and succinct at the same time. You don’t need to write books. I mean, think about if you’re writing 25 pages for each answer. It’s probably you’re trying to justify yourself too much. What does it always say that does protest too much?
Jackie Critzer 9:07
Right… Right.
Scott Cardani 9:08
Now, you got to be careful with that kind of stuff you want to when you do that, you get it affects your credibility. It affects your so just be succinct. These are the issues I’m having. This is the answer to the question. This is why I think dad should not have custody, or should have custody. And let me say this too, you know, a lot of times you’ll get into this because you believe that you have rights greater than you really do. And you know, and so believe me, I think the parental right is the greatest thing, but so is the other parental right. And you may not like the person you hooked up with and whatever, but their rights are equal to yours, and if you are talking down to them from that perspective, a lot of times, Guardians get wind of that, and that creates a problem too. So remember, even if you don’t like the person, respect that he’s an equal partner in the parenting in the law sees him as equal.
Jackie Critzer 9:56
Right.
Scott Cardani 9:57
And you have to show from your position of, I’m superior, but from a position of just truth, of why this is a problem, what’s going on, and take out that whole thing. It’s my child, and it’s my decision, and all those kind of things.
Jackie Critzer 10:11
Yeah and your communications with the guardian ad litem, and really anybody, but especially the guardian ad litem, being possessive of the children in the matter is not a win. That is, that is a dagger in your case, not going to go it’s, that’s, that’s a that’s a little mark against you. They’re not. It’s not my children. You have children together with somebody else. They’re our children. That’s how you refer to them, our children, especially in your correspondence to the other parent, right? Well, my daughter this, or my son that, and we see it from both moms and dads. It’s not any one particular gender that that is the greater offender. They both do it. But when communicating with the guardian ad litem, be sure and and talk about our children. And this is, you know, our family, even though maybe it was never a nuclear family, maybe you never lived together, maybe you did for 15 years, I don’t know, but be sure and use good terminology that’s not overly possessive. The final thing we talked about was being honest, which includes refraining from exaggeration. So there’s lots of things to do when you’ve got a guardian ad litem. And I mean, it goes for guardian ad litems that you do like as well. Do all these things with a guardian you do like, but when you don’t like your guardian ad litem for any amount of reason, the likelihood of getting them removed is very slim. Unless they’re just not doing their they just have done nothing, or they’ve created there’s a conflict that’s arisen.
Scott Cardani 11:32
Even when they do nothing, it’s hard to get them removed.
Jackie Critzer 11:34
It can be depending on the judge. So most of the time you’re the advice you’re going to get from your attorney is there’s not a lot we can do other than do these things, which, again, was, keep the peace, be honest, keep from exaggerating, and certainly be be inviting when they when they come to see you.
Scott Cardani 11:55
And remember, you’ll have your day in court to put on your evidence.
Jackie Critzer 11:57
So for sure, we’re happy to help we deal with, you know, guardian ad litems, and we deal with the courts all from the beach to the Blue Ridge. So we are happy to help you in your custody case. And look forward to hearing from you. Be sure to like and subscribe.
Scott Cardani
Your Shelter in the Storm.
What To Do When… Outro 12:13
We hope you’ve enjoyed this episode of What To Do When… For more episodes, be sure to subscribe to our podcast and we encourage you to check archives to listen to previous topics. Tune in next week for a new episode and some fresh perspective from Critzer Cardani.
Need Legal Representation? Contact Critzer Cardani.
We look forward to helping you in this venture and Good Luck!
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